Pain, knifes, and birds T-Toby X Reader M/F

Key: (Y/N)= your name, (L/N)= last name (F/O)= Favorite outfit (G/B)= Girl or boy

WARNING! Suicidal content, After life Content, Drug Abuse, Alcohol abuse, Self Harm, and Suicidal attempts  You have been warned!
I don't want any BS about it... This is my First X Reader so RAWR! XD Enjoy!


(Y/N)'s POV

Sirens, so faint, but I knew, They where here for me, My name's (Y/N) I'm (Age) Years old, And i'm currently sitting on top of a 20 story building. A bottle of pills, a knife, and a bottle of Jin Next to me and my feet just hanging off the edge of the building. I left a note by the door when I left the house at 2 am this morning, She was the one who called the cops, My mother.

Anyway, I've never been very good at talking to people, or being around them for that matter, I was always picked on. I turned to my so called friends for help, but they left me, My only true friend Died a few years back, Toby Rodgers, And to be honest I loved him... But he went crazy and killed his dad, then died in a fire... I cried for weeks on end. I have tried to Die to be with him many times, But all failed... I slit my wrists... Failed, I shot myself, Failed! I drank alcohol at enormous rates, Failed, I overdosed on pills, Failed! ALL OF THEM! But this is the last time I will try, If I live, Then i'll see my mother tomorrow.
The sirens are getting closer now, i'll wait for them to get here. I hummed a song I learned to love. "and i'm Gone gone gone gone~" I smiled lightly and chugged down the last of the Jin and sighed. I was in my (F/O) and I looked really good, "There getting closer..." *I closed my eyes and sang part of the song. " I wish that I could fly, Way up I the sky, Like a bird so high,... Oh I might just try. I with that I could fly way up in the sky, like a bird so high, oh I might just try.... of I might just try". Just then the door behind me opened looked back and cops flooded out the door.
"Please, Get away from there (Y/N) please don't do this" a lady said, and took a step forward.
"Like fuck you care!" I growled. I stood up and smiled. "The pain ends today," I took a step back and closed my eyes contently. "oh I might just try, oh I might just try~"
"DON'T DO IT!" she screamed.
I looked back at her and on the door way above her was... No.. " T-Toby?"
The lady looked up to where I saw him "there's no one there Dear, Now please, We can help you...".
Toby smiled and turned to dust and blew away in the wind, Tears streamed down my face. "TOBY! DON'T LEAVE ME AGAIN!" I stepped forward but my foot slipped and I fell backwards, everything was in slow motion, Tears still Streaming down my face, and I closed my eyes. Memories flooded my head, Toby and me as kids, playing in the forest, or watching movies. but the one I loved most was on my birthday, toby gave me the best present of my life, he kissed me.
The officer ran over and tried to grab me, "(Y/N)".
I fell too fat for her. I opened my eyes and saw Toby, Leaning over the roof, looking down at me... I smiled at him and whispered, "I love you Toby Rodgers..." I shut my eyes again.... then it all went black. There was no pain, No Screams, no more heart ach... the pills couldn't get me, There was no Drinks to call my name, there was no knife that begged for my blood, just black. I opened my eyes to find myself in a field with poppies, and daises, I looked around, then down at myself. I was a little kid again, no scars, no stiches, nothing...
"(Y/N) I love you too"


News report: A Young (G/B) Jumped from a building today, and died... police and saddened they could not save young (Y/N) (L/N), (Y/N)'s mother was devastated when she found the letter left on the door of there house at 3 am this morning, and says she called 911 after reading it.  the dispatched cops looked all over the city only to find young (Y/N) after hours of searching, we're told they died instantly and suffered no pain. Now for the Weather...